how to deal with adolescent problems and handling common teenager problems and difficulties at home and school environment.
“he is a man suffering from petrified adolescence.”
At sixteen I was stupid, confused, insecure and indecisive.
At twenty-five I was wise, self-confident, prepossessing and assertive.
At forty-five I am stupid, confused, insecure and indecisive. Who would have believed that maturity is only a short break in adolescence.
The observer, 3 Feb. 1974.
Now, do you feel insecure, indecisive and regrettably shy? Everybody is born green inexperienced. Confused and shy; except those types who by a rare stunt of heredity are born, nice, assertive and self-confident.
But don’t worry if you are troubled by early, or late adolescence problems.
There are many factors that determine the type of personality of your son. if you are a father or mother, or of yourself if you happen to be going through the early formative years problems.
Now people don’t realize how much, or what extent they are the same as all living things, like other animals and plants.
For example, a young seedling growing in a poor soil may reveal signs of stunted growth, and doesn’t grow up to the size of a tree with enough rich nourishing soil.
Of course, size and healthy growth, for example, a tree depends upon material condition’s.
As everybody knows the family is the first growth human environment, providing the mental factors for growth of the youngs.
There are healthy and rich family environments as well as unfortunately problematic families.
The analogy between human growth and other living creatures is not an idle one there is a diffence, though between a young seeding or an infant animal and the human young persons.
The psychological and moral factors
It’s observed that the family environment marks the grows of young children with indelible marks; for example, the direct cause of the lack of self-confident comes from the father or mother of the child; there is a psychological element called ” the double-binding effect”: it comes from a domineering father or mother who are themselves confused and troubled like.
do this thing!
and instantly a perplexing corraective:
No! stop, don’t do it!
Of course children look for their parents to show interest in their play with toys or their performance in school: the right thing is you shouldn’t berate them or scold them if they were clumsy in their play or school homework: you should say encouraging words.
One of my friend told me that when eid of sacrifice come, he is a Muslim, his father is a butcher after they slayed the ram and he was watching and when it come to taking the skin off the carcass he asked his father to let him complete it, but his father sad:
NO! it takes mighty strength (عزيمة)to do it!
The friend of mine told me that to this day he suffers from a clumsiness when he uses his hands or stasting anything new; this experience partly petrified his will power.
The quotidian things, good word praise even when undeserved, encouragement and deep concern in what the young ones do.
Love and token rewards for duties done, are the emotional water that help to instill in children a sense of confidence security and self-worth.
The school system
The school is the testing ground for what kind of treatment the family accorded their young one’s the boys with stable and outgoing personalities prosper well in the highly competitive school environment.
Their positive qualities help them to achieve a healthy pro-active relationship with their peers.